Navigating Spiritual Abilities and Trauma: My Journey of Discovery
In the realm of spirituality and self-discovery, the development of intuitive abilities is often seen as sacred abilities to cultivate. We embrace these mystical gifts—whether it be empathy, intuition, channelling, or clairvoyance—as tools for personal growth and insight. However, through a combination of my own trajectory and the patterns witnessed in my coaching clients, I'm discovering that mystical abilities can often arise as unconscious and divine coping mechanisms in response to childhood adversity, trauma and a lack of secure attachment.
In this article, I'll delve into the intriguing interplay between intuition and survival instinct, by exploring my own connection between childhood trauma and the development of my ability to channel the collective unconscious.
Unveiling the Link Between Channelling, Disassociation, and Trauma
In this week's podcast episode, Unveiling the Link Between Channelling, Disassociation, and Trauma, I candidly opened up about my own spiritual ability to read and channel energy—how it started, why it stopped, and how it’s undeniably connected to dissociation and my unprocessed childhood trauma.
Childhood Trauma Shaping Spiritual Abilities
Growing up in a household characterised by narcissistic abuse, an aspect of my past that I've never shared until now, profoundly influenced my development. The hypervigilance I acquired as a response to the demanding environment I was raised in became the bedrock for what I would later recognise as my extrasensory abilities.
The 'Good Girl' Persona and Reflecting Collective Energies
As the proverbial 'good girl,' I always aimed to be liked and accepted by everyone I met, which led me to walk through life as an empty vessel, merely mirroring the world around me. This inclination, coupled with several other factors, played a pivotal role in guiding me toward becoming a conduit for the collective. See, my extrasensory skills to accurately ‘read others’ emerged as an adaptation to read my environment for safety, whilst not really knowing or feeling connected to myself.
Unconscious Exploration Through Channelling
In 2019, when I launched my YouTube channel and began creating channeled transmissions and collective energy readings, I unconsciously used channelling as a way to indirectly explore my suppressed emotions and unprocessed trauma, without having to claim them as my own. By assigning what I accessed as insights about 'the collective', I could avoid what was too painful for me to integrate at the time. Of course this was not my intention, in fact, I had no idea this was happening. It's only through extensive trauma work, soul-searching, and deep introspection that I'm able to honestly share this revelation with you today.
Intuitive Capacities and Their Ambiguous Role
I strongly believe that our intuitive capacities bear a divine purpose, even when they stem from points of suffering. Their inherent design seems to actively drive our collective evolution by expanding our consciousness. However, these trauma-driven adaptations, regardless of how we label them—gifts, abilities, or otherwise—can sometimes end up hindering us more than helping us.
Overindulging in altered states of consciousness propelled me further into the abyss of spiritual bypassing, escapism, and delusional thinking. In the process, I turned a blind eye to the demands of my wounded self, sidestepping the genuine care and attention she so desperately needed.
Reclaiming Wholeness through Healing
It was only by reclaiming the fragmented pieces of myself through trauma therapy and coaching that my channelling abilities began to subside. As I became more grounded, connected to my body, and rooted within the totality of my identity, I no longer needed to disown my inner wisdom. Gradually, the disregarded and stifled aspects of my being harmonised into my existence, enabling me to communicate authentically from my personal truth, rather than relying on the need to channel external entities.
This journey of exploring the shadow origins of mystical gifts is an intimate and ongoing process. While my own abilities have changed through embodiment work, I respect spiritual gifts in all their forms. My hope is simply to shed light on the connections between trauma, dissociation, and extrasensory perceptions. And empower anyone on this path to process unresolved pain so their gifts can flourish from an anchored place of wholeness.
Invitation to Transformation
If this exploration has ignited a sense of resonance within you, I invite you to explore my transformational coaching offering. My work is designed for those going through transitions, seeking to break free of unhealthy patterns, process old wounds, gain confidence, find purpose and meaning, and transcend inner blocks by embarking on a journey of self-discovery that's rooted in both body and spirit.